Spiritual bypassing of emotions When I ask some coachees how they felt about a situation or a loss, they end up explaining it using statements like: “I understand that this is all my ego that is causing this suffering”, “The universe is teaching me detachment”, “I am suffering due to my identity
Coachee: “I didn’t get the promotion I deserved” Me: “Okay… and how did that feel?” Coachee: It probably makes sense—could be budget, visibility, or org priorities.” Me: “Not the explanation. What did you feel?” Coachee: “I mean, these things happen. It’s part of the process. I should try harder next time” Me:
A coachee came to me with a frustration- “I keep postponing quite a few things indefinitely.” When asked about some examples, he mentioned – “I want to start exercising, write stories, and do AI courses. But somehow, I never seem to find the time for these.” Then he paused and added, “The
The ROI Trap: When We Expect Too Much From Our Time A coachee once told me he feels anxious whenever he has to deal with government offices. Even simple tasks like obtaining a certificate or submitting a form made him uncomfortable. He would procrastinate and even avoid the task. At first glance,
Why “We are like a family” can create disappointment at work. A coachee once came to me unhappy with his workplace. He said: “People here are not supportive. My manager doesn’t really have my back. And my colleagues don’t feel like my kind of people.” On the surface, it sounded like a
A couple of years ago, one of my mentees called me. He had just joined a new company. Bigger title, leadership role and a larger team. It was a clear step up compared to his previous role. He asked me, – “It’s a bigger role now. How should I navigate this situation
Procrastination. When someone complains, “I keep procrastinating” on something important, the natural instinct of the listener is to think ‘Oh, maybe he/she is lazy”, “Oh, it’s a poor time management problem.” Then one might prescribe habit trackers, morning routines, accountability, productivity apps and whatnot! They do help sometimes. Not always. After I
A young professional I coached recently shared his story. He had just landed his first job out of college. Moved to a Tier-1 city. Good salary — enough to live good life, explore the city, save and invest a decent amount. The early days were thrilling. New job, new friends, new restaurants,
Identity. Ever wondered why some senior executives — financially secure for life — continue doing roles they dislike? I used to wonder the same. Once, during a candid conversation, an executive opened up. He said, “I continue because it scares me to see who I am without this title.” It wasn’t about
Anger. The topic comes up frequently in coaching conversations. When someone tells me ’I get angry when…’, I get curious. Not about the anger itself, but about what’s sitting underneath that emotion. Because anger is rarely the first emotion. Most of the time, it’s masking something else — something harder to admit.
